Ladies, have you ever found yourself making the following statements to a girlfriend, mother, sister, or mother-in-law in regards to your husband?
"Oh, My Johnnie just loves his video games."
"Yeah. Tim has a whole shelf full of toys."
"It's like they stop growing at 8."
"I think he relates to the kids more than me."
Have you ever said those things in front of your husband. Have you ever said those things in front of your husband at your friend/sister/mother/mother-in-law's?
Think for a moment about all of the idiotic things that men fail to hit the brain to mouth filter switch on. Think about how those things make you feel.
"She couldn't find her way around without that GPS"
"If she liked sex as much as shoes..."
"Don't stretch out my shorts/shirt"
Now sit there for a moment and feel all that frustration. Think about how mad you get when he says something jokingly in front of a friend, or maybe even just to you in private. Feel it? Now imagine that a man - that obedient dog/monkey creature that amazingly manages to drive a vehicle home from work each day has EXACTLY the same feelings as you.
I know what you are thinking, "They can't possibly have the same feelings I do, they're not nearly as mature or well developed." Well despite the obvious lack of communications skills men, do indeed have feelings. And despite the fact that they can sit around with other men for hours on end knocking each others sexual prowess, penis size, ability to fornicate, speed, strength, looks, smell, etc.,. a simple unkind or unflattering word from the opposite sex is like kryptonite.
Men want to win. Men want to be the hero. As soon as they stop winning with you, as soon as they are no longer your hero. What happens?
Oh get off the "equality" bullshit for a while and understand that men and women are fundamentally chemically and biologically different. While I'm sure that there are many women out there that can out lift me, or out run me it doesn't mean we're equal.
The strongest women will never be equal to the strongest man. The man with the highest endurance will never endure as much as the women with the highest endurance. Equality is a pipe dream in that sense.
But COMPASSION is not a pipe dream and it trumps EQUALITY in so many ways. Men and women are similar. Everyone wants to be loved, accepted, cared for, provided for, and nurtured. When these gifts of the heart start to fall by the way side and get replaced with criticisms and commentary even jokingly then compassion is the first thing to go. If you joke with your spouse about their weight because you have frustrations about your own, it doesn't inspire compassion in them, it destroys it. When you poke that pimple on their belly asking "does that hurt" - yes it does both physically and emotionally. When you tell them if you had a choice between sleep or sex, you'd choose sleep. That's like a death sentence for compassion.
Men are, despite the rhetoric, fragile flowers. We need softness, kindness, tender words. We won't tell you these things because frankly we don't think you'll understand.